Monday, 12 September 2011

How Does She Do It?

I recently saw a preview for the movie, “I don’t know how  she does it?” which I believe is now out in theatres.  I have not seen it because, let’s face it people, I am a mother of three beauties under 5 and I do not currently have a babysitter, so movies that are not rented or borrowed are out.  But the preview basically showed a beautiful woman (Sarah Jessica Parker) who did everything from having a full time job, kids, marriage and cupcakes for PTA  while looking  good  and polished doing it as other characters looked on in various parts of her day and wondered “I don’t know how she does it?”.    The premise of the movie preview was that she (Sarah Jessica) made tons of lists, on paper, in her head, wherever.

Now I know exactly what that is like (without the cool shoes that Sarah always gets to wear in all her movies) and I know all about list making as I do that all the time.  I have a million of them all over the house.  I have also actually heard the phrase “How do you do it?” said to me all of the time and it kind of makes we want to laugh or just faint at their feet in exhaustion (serious on the fainting thing) and I am now going to repeat to  myself and to you and state that I am not a super mom!  I just play one on my blog :)  

The idea of doing it all is ridiculous to say the least.  But I do try!  All the time in fact.  I lead a children’s ministry, direct a kids choir, direct a kids movement ministry, homeschool my sidekicks and teach them right from wrong, try to take care of my home and just be that woman Super Dad fell in love with as well as everything else I am asked to do.   I also have plans to take on more ministry. This is the problem that was put upon me on Saturday as Spiderman just held me for an hour after I had been gone all day at the doctors. Becuase I had been doing to much of these things and not at home just being his mom for a while and recovering from my surgery last week.  I know my family needs me to be with them and I need to take care of just myself but I can’t tell everyone no, can I?

Spiderman-so cute and cuddly!
One of my biggest weaknesses, my kryptonite if you will, is my inability to say no.  Its just two letters in the alphabet but it is the hardest word in the English language for me to say when it comes to commitments and favors.  I want to be supermom and do it all in real life just like my blog nickname, so in my head I think I can do it all even if my body says no to me!  So I was doing what all homeschool supermoms out there do, making lists and plans and following them to the letter while my Spiderman was at home wondering where I was.  My lists are many and my plans are great but in that moment on Saturday night while I sat down on the stairs and hugged my little man, God put it back in my heart for the 100th time to slow down and be a wife and a mom first and leave the super out of it.

So how is a homeschool supermom going to cope with that?  Well today, outside of my lesson planner because I need that for Power Princess and Rainbow Brite, I did the unthinkable.  Yes it was awful and too wonderful at the same time.  I threw my lists away in the trash!  I am free!  I have to call a few ladies that I previously made small commitments to and be  honest with them and tell them about how my days are packed, how I can’t commit anymore and really what God is putting on my heart and hope for the best.  I feel awful about that part of it but I know that God wants me to focus on my family right now and on myself (which is especially hard for me) so I will do it.  But today I just tossed that planner and all my lists in the trash and took that bag to the garage!  I still have those calls to make and then well I truly am free to just wait on God and not say yes. 

So to all of my friends and family, I love you and the answer is politely NO.  There I said it or actually wrote it but consider it said :) 

Having wrote all of this, I am now wondering how do you do it all?  Post a comment below and let me know…


  1. I hear that all the time too! "How do you do it?!"...I don't. I can't! I've actually said the words, "I'm no supermom." LOL This was a great post and one I'm sure many of us can relate to. Say no...good for you!

  2. I also whited out a bunch of stuff on the family calendar :)

  3. I look forward to following your journey as I'm in a similar place of realizing that I've been spending too much time on other things. It is so hard to say no, especially when it's for good things. It's good to remember that my first job is wife and mother and I need to do that the best I can before I tackle other things. I read a great book recently about Super Mom and why she's that way- You're a Good Mom by Jen Singer. Good thoughts!

  4. Leatha, I'm proud of you. I've also been saying "no" more. It's hard at first, but the more you do it the easier it gets!!! If it's hard, I just look at Meg, Holly and Nate, and suddenly it's not that hard. Call me if you need support!!!

  5. You and your family come first... you can be supermom to them without having to be a superhero to everyone my friend!

  6. You want to know how I do it all?? HA! I don't! And I don't know any mom that does. Even if it looks like she is, I promise, there is something she's saying "No" to that you've probably said "Yes" to. That's why it seems like she's "doing it all" - you can see that she's doing at least one more thing than you are and you CAN'T see what it is she's NOT doing. That's been my experience anyway.